The Swarm

Sometimes your day will be plodding along smoothly and BAM something snaps you right out of the illusion that life can ever really be easy.  I had an experience like that just a short while ago.  My husband was at his computer, I was at mine and the children were at the kitchen table having a snack.  I could hear them talking to one another and really getting along well.  I was just thinking about how nice and peaceful our evening had been when from the kitchen came blood curdling screams from my daughter.  About 2 seconds later my older son started yelling "Oh no we're gonna die!!!".  Then I hear their baby brother start yelling "Help!  Sissy's screaming".  Not surprisingly I jumped up, dumping my laptop onto the floor and ran like a crazy person to the kitchen.  I was terrified.  I just knew that I would see a bloody mess when I got there.  There was no bloody mess.  In fact, as I stood looking at my screaming daughter I thought "what the hell?"  Let's see if I can provide a better visual.  My girl is in a kitchen chair bunched up like a Roly Poly screaming at an ungodly high pitch.  Son #1 is INSIDE the pantry sreaming "They're gonna get us, they're gonna get us".  Son #2 (who is 3) is kind of just yelling because it looks like maybe that's what he should do since his role models are doing it.   My husband (who despite the screaming had yet to grace us with his presence) seemed oblivious.  I only had to yell three times "WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?"  Finally as if they had rehearsed it there were simultaneous answers, one from the chair and one from inside the pantry.  They answered as follows.  Darling daughter screamed "They're everywhere".  The Boy In the Pantry yelled "They're going to eat us!!!!"  I looked from one end of the kitchen to the other and saw.........nothing.  "What's everywhere?" I asked.  I was ready for a flipping answer.  I thought we were about to need an exorism!  Finally my girl said "  BUGS! THEY'RE EVERYWHERE"!!!   This would be the point where my husbands absence would cease.  "Honey get in here now!  We need you!" It was time for him to make an appearance.  While I did not see any bugs hysteria is very contagious, plus I HATE BUGS!!!!  Finally my dear sweet hubby appeared.  He is so smart.  He knew just what to do.  Why didn't I think of it?.......He asked......"Where are they?"  He's brilliant, isn't he?  I must admit that although my children were under obvious duress, once the word "Bug" was uttered I had backed around a corner and was peeking out at the poor screaming little people. 
At this point I was expecting something on par with, let's say, a swarming horde of locusts.  When that child unwrapped her arm from around her legs and pointed up at the wall I saw it too!!!!  IT WAS HORRIBLE!!!!   Not really, It was one freaking mosquito!   My hero husband got what we call around here the "Fly flip" and squish, problem solved.  Right?    Wrong.  While my daughter had calmed slightly child number 2 had stuck his head out of the pantry.  He was yelling "You didn't get them all, they're all over the kithen!"  Finally he pointed to an upside down beetle of some type.  I have to say, it was very threatening lying there not moving like that.  Dad squished it anyway and finally the screams stopped.  While I really didn't want a huge swarm of something flying/crawling in my kitchen I was a little ticked off that I had gotten so worked up over 1 mosquito and 1 beetle.  I mean, it was almost a let down.  It took several minutes to get them down off the chair and out of the pantry but,  finally they seemed to chill out a little.  After everyone was quiet we did have a discussion to the effect of "If you EVER throw a crazy fit like that over something so stupid you guys are going down". 
Things have calmed down since then...sort of.  The big kids are asleep, but the screaming their baby brother did was like a shot of adrenaline.  Hopefully he'll go to sleep before dawn.
Blessings from my world,
Amanda